When I was at Dartmouth in the late 1940s, the tuition, room, and board all added up to $1,100 a year. Nobody owned a home computer, and hardly anyone had a television set. And those who did, there was a choice of three channels. I’m not sure if Jeanne Shaheen was even born yet, but very few people would have guessed that within 50 years, a woman would be governor or New Hampshire. Yes. When I was here, the first word of the alma mater was “Men. Men of Dartmouth give a rouse.”Well, now the first word is "Dear." Some things change for the better.
During my first year here, I lived right over there at 101 Middle Mass. And I had two roommates. I had a professor, over there, who did his best to scare everyone in his class, and he gave me the lowest grade that I ever had in any school anywhere. But I also had an astronomy professor, George Dimitrov, who looked for and found what was best in each of his students. When I look at the night sky, I still think of that extra special, kind man.
Dartmouth is many things to each of us, and I'm grateful to Jim and Susan Wright for all that they have done for this school. And I’m grateful to my old friend, Chick Koop, for all that he has done for all of us. And I congratulate every one of you who is being honored in any way during this Commencement weekend.
Our world hangs like a magnificent jewel in the vastness of space. Every one of us is a part of that jewel. A facet of that jewel. And in the perspective of infinity, our differences are infinitesimal. We are intimately related. May we never even pretend that we are not.
Have you heard my favorite story that came from the Seattle Special Olympics? Well, for the 100-yard dash, there were nine contestants, all of them so-called physically or mentally disabled. All nine of them assembled at the starting line, and at the sound of the gun, they took off. But not long afterward, one little boy stumbled and fell, and hurt his knee and began to cry. The other eight children heard him crying. They slowed down, turned around, and ran back to him. Every one of them ran back to him. One little girl with Down Syndrome bent down and kissed the boy, and said, “This'll make it better.”The little boy got up, and he and the rest of the runners linked their arms together, and joyfully walked to the finish line. They all finished the race at the same time. And when they did, everyone in that stadium stood up, and clapped, and whistled, and cheered for a long, long time. People who were there are still telling this story with great delight. And you know why. Because deep down, we know that what matters in this life is more than winning for ourselves. What really matters is helping others win, too. Even if it means slowing down and changing our course now and then.
Anicius Manlius Severinus Boethius—what a name—was the last of the great Roman philosophers, and the first of the scholastics of the Middle Ages. Fifteen hundred years ago, Boethius wrote this sentence, “O happy race of mortals, if your hearts are ruled as is the universe, by Love.”
I was once invited to sit in on a master class of six young cellists from the Pittsburgh Youth Symphony Orchestra. The master teacher was Yo-Yo Ma. Now, Yo-Yo is the most other-oriented genius I’ve every known. His music comes from a very deep place within his being. And during that master class, Yo-Yo gently led those young cellists into understandings about their instruments, their music, and their selves, which some of them told me later, they’d carry with them forever.
I can still see the face of one young man who had just finished playing a movement of Brahms’Cello Sonata, when Yo-Yo said, “Nobody else can make the sound you make.”Of course, he meant that as a compliment to the young man. Nevertheless, he meant that also for everyone in the class. Nobody else can make the sound you make. Nobody else can choose to make that particular sound in that particular way.
I’m very much interested in choices, and what it is, and who it is, that enable us human beings to make the choices we make all through our lives. What choices lead to ethnic cleansing? What choices lead to healing? What choices lead to the destruction of the environment, the erosion of the Sabbath, suicide bombings, or teenagers shooting teachers. What choices encourage heroism in the midst of chaos?
I have a lot of framed things in my office, which people have given to me through the years. And on my walls are Greek, and Hebrew, and Russian, and Chinese. And beside my chair, is a French sentence from Saint-Exupery’s Little Prince. It reads, “L’essential est invisible pour les yeux.”What is essential is invisible to the eye. Well, what is essential about you? And who are those who have helped you become the person you are? Anyone who has ever graduated from a college, anyone who has ever been able to sustain a good work, has had at least one person, and often many, who have believed in him or her. We just don’t get to be competent human beings without a lot of different investments from others.
I’d like to give you all an invisible gift. A gift of a silent minute to think about those who have helped you become who you are today. Some of them may be here right now. Some may be far away. Some, like my astronomy professor, may even be in Heaven. But wherever they are, if they’ve loved you, and encouraged you, and wanted what was best in life for you, they’re right inside your self. And I feel that you deserve quiet time, on this special occasion, to devote some thought to them. So, let’s just take a minute, in honor of those that have cared about us all along the way. One silent minute.
Whomever you’ve been thinking about, imagine how grateful they must be, that during your silent times, you remember how important they are to you. It’s not the honors and the prizes, and the fancy outsides of life which ultimately nourish our souls. It’s the knowing that we can be trusted. That we never have to fear the truth. That the bedrock of our lives, from which we make our choices, is very good stuff.
There’s a neighborhood song that is meant for the child in each of us, and I’dlike to give you the words of that song right now. “It’s you I like, it’s not the things you wear. It’s not the way you do your hair, but it’s you I like. The way you are right now, the way down deep inside you. Not the things that hide you. Not your caps and gowns, they’re just beside you. But it’s you I like. Every part of you. Your skin, your eyes, your feelings. Whether old or new, I hope that you remember, even when you're feeling blue, that it’s you I like. It’s you, yourself, it’s you. It’s you I like.”
And what that ultimately means, of course, is that you don't ever have to do anything sensational for people to love you. When I say it’s you I like, I’m talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than anything you can ever see, or hear, or touch. That deep part of you, that allows you to stand for those things, without which humankind cannot survive. Love that conquers hate. Peace that rises triumphant over war. And justice that proves more powerful than greed.
So, in all that you do in all of your life, I wish you the strength and the grace to make those choices which will allow you and your neighbor to become the best of whoever you are. Congratulations to you all.
帮助孩子理解悲剧的原因：Sometimes we need to struggle with the tragedy to feel the gravity of love. 这句让我想到《宝石之国》里对于死亡的解释：死は何もかも台無しにする代わりに、生を価値ある物にする。そう悪いものでもない。（其实是在暗示无机物的基础？）
总想法：It’s the root of everything. All learning, all parenting, all relationship. Love or the lack of it.
关于情绪控制：You've made this day a special day by just you're being you. There's no person in the whole world like you and I like you just the way you are. What do you do with the mad when you feel so mad you could bite? When the whole wide world seems oh-so wrong and nothing you do seems very right? It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong and be able to do something else instead. And think this song. I can stop when I want to, can stop when I wish. Can stop stop stop any time. Know that there's something deep inside that helps us become what we can.
事实上，Rogers最喜欢的名言就来自《小王子》，“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret. It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eyes（“L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux."）.”
罗杰斯先生：我们为东部教育网络EEN制作了一百个节目，然后当资金用尽时，波士顿，匹兹堡和芝加哥的人们都争相说我们必须有更多的友邻式的关心。这就是我所给予的。我每天都对每一个孩子表达关心，帮助他意识到他是独一无二的。我结束这个节目时说：“You've made this day a special day, by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you, and I like you, just the way you are.”而且我觉得如果我们在公共电视中能说明感情是可以被提及和可控制的，我们就会为心理健康做出很好的贡献。我认为两个男人可以显露他们的愤怒情绪比用枪火表达愤怒更具戏剧性。我一直关注孩子们所看到的东西，15年来我曾在美国和加拿大尝试过，表达我认为有意义的关心的表达方式。
What do you do with the mad that you feel? When you feel so mad you could bite. When the whole wide world seems oh so wrong, and nothing you do seems very right. What do you do? Do you punch a bag? Do you pound some clay or some dough? Do you round up friends for a game of tag or see how fast you go? It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong. And be able to do something else instead, and think this song --
'I can stop when I want to. Can stop when I wish. Can stop, stop, stop anytime....And what a good feeling to feel like this! And know that the feeling is really mine. Know that there's something deep inside that helps us become what we can. For a girl can be someday a lady, and a boy can be someday a man.'
Fred Rogers 早前要作一名牧师，但他非常重视儿童教育，认为对小孩子的正确引导对他们的成长很重要，于是在PBS开创了自己的儿童节目。他通过布偶角色小老虎丹尼尔，以简单易懂的方式给小朋友讲述作人的道理，生活里遇到挫折要怎么处理，要如何看待自己等问题。甚至也会用这个节目让孩子们学会理解成人现实中发生的真实事件，比如911， 总统被刺杀，战争等。他也会通过与黑人一起泡脚来教会小朋友不要种族歧视。他的方式非常温和有耐心，最终成为影响时代人的榜样。n
You are a very special person. There is only one like you in the whole world. There's never been anyone exactly like you before, and there will never be again. Only you. And people can like you exactly as you are.
因为文化语境不同，我记忆中其实从来没有听到过这句“And people can like you exactly as you are.” 所以在听到Fred笃定地说出这句话的时候，我联想到前段时间的不安全感，无法克制地哭了。（这句话是我网上找到的。影片里的版本还带有You are capable of loving exactly as you are的意思，更是戳到我心里。）
When I was at Dartmouth in the late 1940s, the tuition, room, and board all added up to $1,100 a year. Nobody owned a home computer, and hardly anyone had a television set. And those who did, there was a choice of three channels. I’m not sure if Jeanne Shaheen was even born yet, but very few people would have guessed that within 50 years, a woman would be governor or New Hampshire. Yes. When I was here, the first word of the alma mater was “Men. Men of Dartmouth give a rouse.”Well, now the first word is "Dear." Some things change for the better.
During my first year here, I lived right over there at 101 Middle Mass. And I had two roommates. I had a professor, over there, who did his best to scare everyone in his class, and he gave me the lowest grade that I ever had in any school anywhere. But I also had an astronomy professor, George Dimitrov, who looked for and found what was best in each of his students. When I look at the night sky, I still think of that extra special, kind man.
Dartmouth is many things to each of us, and I'm grateful to Jim and Susan Wright for all that they have done for this school. And I’m grateful to my old friend, Chick Koop, for all that he has done for all of us. And I congratulate every one of you who is being honored in any way during this Commencement weekend.
Our world hangs like a magnificent jewel in the vastness of space. Every one of us is a part of that jewel. A facet of that jewel. And in the perspective of infinity, our differences are infinitesimal. We are intimately related. May we never even pretend that we are not.
Have you heard my favorite story that came from the Seattle Special Olympics? Well, for the 100-yard dash, there were nine contestants, all of them so-called physically or mentally disabled. All nine of them assembled at the starting line, and at the sound of the gun, they took off. But not long afterward, one little boy stumbled and fell, and hurt his knee and began to cry. The other eight children heard him crying. They slowed down, turned around, and ran back to him. Every one of them ran back to him. One little girl with Down Syndrome bent down and kissed the boy, and said, “This'll make it better.”The little boy got up, and he and the rest of the runners linked their arms together, and joyfully walked to the finish line. They all finished the race at the same time. And when they did, everyone in that stadium stood up, and clapped, and whistled, and cheered for a long, long time. People who were there are still telling this story with great delight. And you know why. Because deep down, we know that what matters in this life is more than winning for ourselves. What really matters is helping others win, too. Even if it means slowing down and changing our course now and then.
Anicius Manlius Severinus Boethius—what a name—was the last of the great Roman philosophers, and the first of the scholastics of the Middle Ages. Fifteen hundred years ago, Boethius wrote this sentence, “O happy race of mortals, if your hearts are ruled as is the universe, by Love.”
I was once invited to sit in on a master class of six young cellists from the Pittsburgh Youth Symphony Orchestra. The master teacher was Yo-Yo Ma. Now, Yo-Yo is the most other-oriented genius I’ve every known. His music comes from a very deep place within his being. And during that master class, Yo-Yo gently led those young cellists into understandings about their instruments, their music, and their selves, which some of them told me later, they’d carry with them forever.
I can still see the face of one young man who had just finished playing a movement of Brahms’Cello Sonata, when Yo-Yo said, “Nobody else can make the sound you make.”Of course, he meant that as a compliment to the young man. Nevertheless, he meant that also for everyone in the class. Nobody else can make the sound you make. Nobody else can choose to make that particular sound in that particular way.
I’m very much interested in choices, and what it is, and who it is, that enable us human beings to make the choices we make all through our lives. What choices lead to ethnic cleansing? What choices lead to healing? What choices lead to the destruction of the environment, the erosion of the Sabbath, suicide bombings, or teenagers shooting teachers. What choices encourage heroism in the midst of chaos?
I have a lot of framed things in my office, which people have given to me through the years. And on my walls are Greek, and Hebrew, and Russian, and Chinese. And beside my chair, is a French sentence from Saint-Exupery’s Little Prince. It reads, “L’essential est invisible pour les yeux.”What is essential is invisible to the eye. Well, what is essential about you? And who are those who have helped you become the person you are? Anyone who has ever graduated from a college, anyone who has ever been able to sustain a good work, has had at least one person, and often many, who have believed in him or her. We just don’t get to be competent human beings without a lot of different investments from others.
I’d like to give you all an invisible gift. A gift of a silent minute to think about those who have helped you become who you are today. Some of them may be here right now. Some may be far away. Some, like my astronomy professor, may even be in Heaven. But wherever they are, if they’ve loved you, and encouraged you, and wanted what was best in life for you, they’re right inside your self. And I feel that you deserve quiet time, on this special occasion, to devote some thought to them. So, let’s just take a minute, in honor of those that have cared about us all along the way. One silent minute.
Whomever you’ve been thinking about, imagine how grateful they must be, that during your silent times, you remember how important they are to you. It’s not the honors and the prizes, and the fancy outsides of life which ultimately nourish our souls. It’s the knowing that we can be trusted. That we never have to fear the truth. That the bedrock of our lives, from which we make our choices, is very good stuff.
There’s a neighborhood song that is meant for the child in each of us, and I’dlike to give you the words of that song right now. “It’s you I like, it’s not the things you wear. It’s not the way you do your hair, but it’s you I like. The way you are right now, the way down deep inside you. Not the things that hide you. Not your caps and gowns, they’re just beside you. But it’s you I like. Every part of you. Your skin, your eyes, your feelings. Whether old or new, I hope that you remember, even when you're feeling blue, that it’s you I like. It’s you, yourself, it’s you. It’s you I like.”
And what that ultimately means, of course, is that you don't ever have to do anything sensational for people to love you. When I say it’s you I like, I’m talking about that part of you that knows that life is far more than anything you can ever see, or hear, or touch. That deep part of you, that allows you to stand for those things, without which humankind cannot survive. Love that conquers hate. Peace that rises triumphant over war. And justice that proves more powerful than greed.
So, in all that you do in all of your life, I wish you the strength and the grace to make those choices which will allow you and your neighbor to become the best of whoever you are. Congratulations to you all.
帮助孩子理解悲剧的原因：Sometimes we need to struggle with the tragedy to feel the gravity of love. 这句让我想到《宝石之国》里对于死亡的解释：死は何もかも台無しにする代わりに、生を価値ある物にする。そう悪いものでもない。（其实是在暗示无机物的基础？）
总想法：It’s the root of everything. All learning, all parenting, all relationship. Love or the lack of it.
关于情绪控制：You've made this day a special day by just you're being you. There's no person in the whole world like you and I like you just the way you are. What do you do with the mad when you feel so mad you could bite? When the whole wide world seems oh-so wrong and nothing you do seems very right? It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong and be able to do something else instead. And think this song. I can stop when I want to, can stop when I wish. Can stop stop stop any time. Know that there's something deep inside that helps us become what we can.
原载于 个人公众号： 一只开山怪 （或搜索 herringcat）
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还记得《小王子》开头那顶帽子吗？
其实是只吞了大象的蛇。
圣埃克苏佩里在《小王子》的扉页送给每个大人一句话——
“每个大人都曾是孩子，但只有很少的人还记得。”
如果有人记得，
Fred Rogers一定是这很少的人之一。
我从事电视业，是因为我讨厌它。
1948年，在大四毕业前，Rogers在回家的假期第一次看见了电视。那时美国电视业仍在发展阶段，还只有三大电视广播网，电视上终日播放的都是现在看来非常初级的综艺节目，比如往嘉宾脸上扔奶油派……Rogers不喜欢这些娱乐节目，他认为“有一种方法可以利用这种神奇的工具来培养那些愿意观看和倾听的人”。尤其是，在当时的电视业中，分级制还尚未被提上日程，缺乏针对儿童成长的节目。
Rogers在PBS主持的最有名，也是播出时间最长的节目叫Mister Rogers' Neighborhood，节目主要是Rogers先生用玩偶对话进行小剧场表演。每个节目开头，穿着针织衫的Rogers先生都会从门外进来，脱去大衣，脱鞋子，然后坐在椅子上，开始讲述新一天的话题。节目的话题很广泛，从家庭兄妹的情感到战争，刺杀，甚至死亡，再到后来80年代，90年代出现的热门议题，诸如种族歧视，同性恋，超级英雄……他帮助孩子们发现小事的价值，从不回避社会争议。他认为每个孩子都有公平的了解世界的权利。
对于种族歧视，他邀请另外一位黑人演员到Mister Rogers的院子里，在一起泡脚；在越战时期，他的布偶King Friday XIII（一位君主）就在自己的堡垒边竖起了铁丝网和墙，用来当做隔离障碍（如今看来，真像一个寓言），让孩子们理解战争的意义。
Rogers有自己独特的话语翻译步骤和儿童交流，从放弃成人式的思考到添加一个简单的动机性想法，例如:“在街上玩是很危险的”最终可以变成“你最喜欢的成年人可以告诉你在哪里玩是安全的。听他们的话真好。”很多学前心理研究都表明，观看过Mister Rogers Neighbor的小朋友，比观看其他儿童节目（比如《芝麻街》）的孩子，更有耐心，专注力，收到并给予更多的正强化（positive reinforcement）。
如果我小时候看过这个节目，我的人生可能会从此不一样
这个纪录片最妙的地方在于，它证明了Rogers先生不仅公平地对待孩子，尊重他们。他的爱和关心，同样对那些已经长大了的成年观众，是更加难能可贵的。因为Rogers先生对人的爱，是无条件的，并给予足够尊重的。
“如果我小时候看过这个节目，我的人生可能会从此不一样。”
很多看完纪录片的观众都在review中后悔自己在小时候因为嫌弃节目节奏缓慢，而没有看下去。等到他们成年了，再通过纪录片回看Rogers先生的节目，了解他的为人，他们说如果早一点看过Mister Rogers，自己的成长期就不会那么痛苦，自己的人生或许会少很多坎坷。
因为他告诉每一个观众，你就是你自己，独一无二。
就像小王子对待他的玫瑰花。
事实上，Rogers最喜欢的名言就来自《小王子》，“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret. It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eyes（“L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux."）.”
他敏感而包容，他的眼睛会发现美，也能包容那些不那么美的。他会试着理解，总是能看到那些被忽视的可贵之处。
胖Freddy，我们会抓到你的！
Rogers出生于匹兹堡的上流社会，家庭富裕，从小受基督教熏陶。他在小学时就已经流露出对他人无私的关心。他的同学回忆说，他告诉父母班级里有个小孩的家长无法负担为孩子买新鞋。没过几天，那个孩子就穿着新鞋子来到学校了。在Rogers生日那天，全体同学都会早放学，因为Rogers的妈妈请全班同学去城里看电影。度假结束后开学，Fred也会给老师和同学们带来礼物。Rogers的妈妈Nancy也经常帮助社区里的其他家庭，她和丈夫或多或少每周都会开出几张支票支援贫困家庭。每逢感恩节，Rogers一家会为公司里的员工送去火鸡，并向社区里匮乏食物的家庭送去食物篮。曾经为Fred家族工作的Anna离职后，每年圣诞节仍会收到Rogers家寄来的祝福卡片和支票。
家庭的富裕虽然让Rogers的同学们在日后回忆中对他印象深刻，但在当时，却让Rogers成为了学校的异类。在Great Depression之后的匹兹堡，富裕并不是一种常态。当时发生了许多仇富蓄意报复事件——富人家的孩子被绑架，两个月后，散落的遗骸被发现。一次放学，母亲没有按时来接Rogers，他只能从学校走10个街区独自回家，走到半路，他发现身后聚集了一批小混混，他们追赶他，对他大叫：“胖Freddy，我们会抓到你的！”。
纵然他对人友善，从不炫富，甚至会刻意隐瞒并否认家庭的富裕，但种种不愉快的经历和被孤立让Rogers的青春期变得敏感而脆弱。高中时期（1940s），Rogers拥有了一辆属于自己的车，他会开车上学，但把车停在离学校还有几个街区的地方，因为他不想让同学知道他的与众不同。
即使是成名以后，Rogers也经常被脱口秀和模仿节目恶搞。那些节目里的人模仿他穿毛衣，系鞋带，面露微笑，讽刺他缓慢的语调，毫无男子气概。这种拙劣的模仿非常残忍。但Rogers并不在意，他允许别人模仿他，只要没有敌意。他甚至在《SCTV》里打扮成一个90磅重、胸部凹陷的弱者，和胸部丰满的女性茱莉亚·查尔德(Julia Child)一起站在拳击台上。他参加比赛时，腿上故意粘着泥，袜子又黑又乱。
他对别人的嘲笑毫不在意，只要不涉及到他的原则，他都可以忍受。他愿意分享的都是爱，但从不强加于人。
虽然罗杰斯的价值观和表演是以他的基督教价值观为基础的，但他从未试图把自己的信仰强加给犹太教工或非宗教教工。与他一起师从Margaret McFarland的Hedda Sharapan说， “我父亲在战争结束后在集中营里找到了自己的父亲……所以大屠杀是我家庭中非常重要的一部分。弗雷德·罗杰斯信仰和事奉是以基督教为基础的。然而，我总是觉得他对犹太人的开放让人感觉很舒服……我不知道该如何描述他的这种感觉，大概是一种善良和体贴。”
It's you I like
今天是感恩节。
就像《真爱至上》应该在圣诞节看，《生活多美好》应该在跨年夜看，《东成西就》应该在除夕夜看，《与我为邻》是一部属于感恩节的电影。
很适合Fred Rogers先生。
适合他的这首歌：
It's you I like,
It's not the things you wear,
It's not the way you do your hair
But it's you I like
The way you are right now,
The way down deep inside you
Not the things that hide you,
Not your toys
They're just beside you.
But it's you I like
Every part of you.
Your skin, your eyes, your feelings
Whether old or new.
I hope that you'll remember
Even when you're feeling blue
That it's you I like,
It's you yourself
It's you.
It's you I like.
附录是Rogers先生在1969参议院听证会的讲话记录，也是他在节目之外为大多数人所熟知的时刻。他对参议员说了自己的节目，他在每天节目最后会说：
“You've made this day a special day, by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you, and I like you, just the way you are.”
希望你可以继续爱自己。
ღ( ´･ᴗ･` )比心
.附录
时值尼克松为越战增加资金提议削减对儿童电视节目开销的补助，参议院为此召开听证会。Rogers在与会第二天发言，在此之前的发言中，主持会议的参议员一直很严肃，参会的教育家和主持人都没有任何获取资助的进展。Rogers用他6分钟的发言为自己所属的电视台PBS争取了2000万美元的资助。
以下翻译自Fred Rogers Testimony before the Senate Subcommittee. May 1, 1969
参议员帕斯托雷：好的，罗杰斯，该你发言了。
罗杰斯先生：帕斯托雷参议员，这是一份哲学性的声明，大概需要十分钟的时间来阅读，所以我不会这么做。一个孩子在一个健康的家庭里学到的第一件事就是信任，我相信你所说的你会读我们所有人的陈述。这件事对我很重要。我非常关心孩子。
帕斯托雷参议员：如果让你照稿子读，你会不会高兴一点？
罗杰斯先生：我只想谈一谈我的看法。我的第一个儿童项目是15年前的WQED，预算是30美元。现在，在SearsRoebuck基金会和国家教育电视台以及所有附属电视台的帮助下——每个播放节目的电视台都为我们的节目付费。这是教育电视的一种独特的资助方式。有了这个帮助，我们的项目现在的预算是6000美元。这听起来可能有很大的不同，但是6000美元买一段不到两分钟的卡通片。我有时会说这是一种奢侈。据我所知，我非常关心，在这个国家，我们的孩子会得到什么。我在儿童发展领域工作了六年，试图了解儿童的内在需求。我们处理这样的事情——就像童年的内心戏剧一样。我们没必要为了取悦而在屏幕上制造戏剧性。我们节目处理诸如理发之类的事情，或者是对兄弟姐妹的感觉，以及在简单的家庭环境中产生的那种愤怒。我们富有建设性的讨论这些话题。
参议员帕斯托雷：一次节目有多长时间？
罗杰斯先生：每天半小时。大多数频道都会在中午和晚上安排。 WETA在傍晚。
参议员Pastore：我们可以得到一份这样的剧本，以便我们可以看到它吗？也许不是今天，但我想看看这个节目。
罗杰斯先生：我非常希望你能看到它。
参议员帕斯托雷：我想看看这个节目本身，或者其中任何一个。
罗杰斯先生：我们为东部教育网络EEN制作了一百个节目，然后当资金用尽时，波士顿，匹兹堡和芝加哥的人们都争相说我们必须有更多的友邻式的关心。这就是我所给予的。我每天都对每一个孩子表达关心，帮助他意识到他是独一无二的。我结束这个节目时说：“You've made this day a special day, by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you, and I like you, just the way you are.”而且我觉得如果我们在公共电视中能说明感情是可以被提及和可控制的，我们就会为心理健康做出很好的贡献。我认为两个男人可以显露他们的愤怒情绪比用枪火表达愤怒更具戏剧性。我一直关注孩子们所看到的东西，15年来我曾在美国和加拿大尝试过，表达我认为有意义的关心的表达方式。
参议员帕斯托雷：你是主持人吗？
罗杰斯先生：我是主持人，是的。我做所有的木偶，我写了所有的音乐，我写了所有的脚本。
参议员帕斯托雷：嗯，我应该表现的像一个非常强硬的人，但这是我过去两天第一次出现鸡皮疙瘩。
罗杰斯先生：嗯，我很感激，不仅是因为你的鸡皮疙瘩，还有你的兴趣 - 我们的沟通方式。我可以告诉你其中一首歌的歌词吗，我觉得这很重要？
参议员帕斯托雷：可以。
罗杰斯先生：这与我觉得孩子们需要知道的良好控制感有关。它开始说：“你对你所感受到的疯狂做了什么？”第一句歌词来自一个孩子。我和孩子一起做木偶 - 与小团体进行非常个人的交流：
What do you do with the mad that you feel? When you feel so mad you could bite. When the whole wide world seems oh so wrong, and nothing you do seems very right. What do you do? Do you punch a bag? Do you pound some clay or some dough? Do you round up friends for a game of tag or see how fast you go? It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong. And be able to do something else instead, and think this song --
'I can stop when I want to. Can stop when I wish. Can stop, stop, stop anytime....And what a good feeling to feel like this! And know that the feeling is really mine. Know that there's something deep inside that helps us become what we can. For a girl can be someday a lady, and a boy can be someday a man.'
参议员帕斯托雷：我认为这很精彩。我觉得这太好了。看起来，你刚刚赢得了2000万美元。
原载于个人公众号：一只开山怪（Herringcat）
忘记这是否是我今年给的第一个A。也许你不知道本片主角Fred Rogers 是谁，但可以肯定的是，只要你用心看了本片，最后结尾时一定会泪流满面，不是因为悲惨而哭泣，是因为深深的感动。
一开始我也不清楚Fred Rogers 是谁，所以本片最初上映时我都没去看。后来发现好评如潮又去补课，非常庆幸了解了这位优秀儿童节目主持人如此正面积极的人生。为什么我们大部分人并不清楚他是谁？因为我们不是在美国长大的，没有从小看他的节目，特别是如果你还没有孩子可能更不会关心到儿童节目。影院里同来看的大部分是50岁-80岁的人，相信都是被他曾打动、影响过的一代。很多老人都带着轮椅，拄着拐杖，与老伴相互搀扶着来捧场，真是一时间让我以为自己买到了“老年干部专场”的票影片已经上映了快一个月，却依然白天都满场，而且片尾大家都在擦眼泪。第一次感受到一个深入美国人民心中的公众形象所带来的积极影响。n
观影过程中，出现了Fred Rogers创作的布偶角色小老虎丹尼尔(Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood)我才恍然大悟，原来他就是目前家喻户晓美国动画角色小老虎丹尼尔（的创作者而制片。我儿子目前就常在电视或书里看到小老虎丹尼尔的角色。n
Fred Rogers 早前要作一名牧师，但他非常重视儿童教育，认为对小孩子的正确引导对他们的成长很重要，于是在PBS开创了自己的儿童节目。他通过布偶角色小老虎丹尼尔，以简单易懂的方式给小朋友讲述作人的道理，生活里遇到挫折要怎么处理，要如何看待自己等问题。甚至也会用这个节目让孩子们学会理解成人现实中发生的真实事件，比如911， 总统被刺杀，战争等。他也会通过与黑人一起泡脚来教会小朋友不要种族歧视。他的方式非常温和有耐心，最终成为影响时代人的榜样。n
在他之前，我还真不知道有任何成人公众人物对小朋友和家长们有如此大的影响。但他的一些说法也有人不同意。比如他告诉小朋友要认识到自己的与众不同，每个人天生都是独特的，有人欣赏的。这让孩子们有自信，但同时也被人当作是给懒惰找借口。一些家长觉得这样他们的孩子就不努力了。也就是说，Fred Rogers 正面鼓励式的教育，与一些家长贬低攀比鞭策式的教育方式矛盾。但说实话，我就是在贬低式教育下长大的，我不认为这样的方式有利于儿童，反而是多多表扬，比较正面的引导和鼓励，真的可以让孩子有更加积极健康的心态。n
当然，每个家长的教育方式都不同，确实很难说对错。但在抛开这些不同看法外，Fred Rogers 处理矛盾和争议的方式也十分值得大家学习，那就是，他总是去想更为正面积极的事，并坚持自己的原则。在他被批评时，他并没有反击，也没有因此就改变自己，而是继续鼓励大家去时常回想对自己有帮助，有恩德的人，并感谢他们的恩惠，这真的会让人从心底里感受到更多的爱，而不是仇恨。
本纪录片最独特的地方是采访了很多他合作过的同事和家人，但谈及的主要是他的事业与为人，而不是挖掘他的隐私。整个影片拍摄手法和剪辑及配乐都十分符合Fred Rogers 本人乐观的态度，很多场景十分打动人心。推荐给作家长或对美国文化历史有兴趣的观众们n
另外，汤姆汉克斯也将在一部即将开拍的电影里饰演他，用人物传记片的方式讲述他的人生。汤姆汉克斯之前已经出演过迪士尼先生，声音和外形也确实非常和蔼可亲。n
本片烂番茄99%好评度，有望竞争明年奥斯卡最佳纪录片。
从影院出来的时候，碰到两个阿姨一边抹眼睛一边说：“我知道我会这样，可我还是来看了。我需要好好哭一场。”
我并不认识Fred Rogers，可是从影片开始我就哭成一团，到影片结束，哭得上气不接下气。不是因为难过，而是因为太温暖了。
上周偶然一次抱着枕头的动作让我回忆起来了小时候被抱着或者抱着家人睡觉的感觉。也可能是抱着被子。那时候人小，随便一个什么东西抱在手里就觉得巨大，然后就有深深的安全感。再一次通过动作回忆起这个感觉，幸福地在床上打滚傻笑了很久，然后发现也很久没有这样傻笑了，再然后就被治愈了。
这个片子给人也是类似的感觉。你有多久没有被别人确定地、眼睛对着眼睛地说：
因为文化语境不同，我记忆中其实从来没有听到过这句“And people can like you exactly as you are.” 所以在听到Fred笃定地说出这句话的时候，我联想到前段时间的不安全感，无法克制地哭了。（这句话是我网上找到的。影片里的版本还带有You are capable of loving exactly as you are的意思，更是戳到我心里。）
单纯地无条件地被安慰，这是打动我的第一层。
第二层是对不安的宽容。
油管视频
影片里小老虎对漂亮姐姐诉说着自我怀疑，漂亮姐姐安慰他，你不是一个错误。你会以为，小老虎就此开心地笑了，但是Fred没有让他这么做。相反，小老虎和漂亮姐姐的对话变成了一个自我怀疑和安慰的二重唱。不安全感可能永远存在，哪怕是毫无缘由的不安全感。但是这没关系，我们可以让内心多一个声音，把它变成一个二重唱。仅仅是这两者的共存就可以填补内心的缝隙。
Fred还在节目里邀请了一个马上就要动重大手术的孩子。他问孩子：“你也会有沮丧的时候吧？”孩子点头。然后他说：“但不是现在。现在我们很开心。”孩子又点头。短短几句话，表达了理解、安慰、支持、信任，成了一个二重唱。
第三层是在给予安慰时，Fred如何应对自身的不安。挑战者号事件和911发生时，Fred不知道该如何应对这些灾难。他自己也在深深的不安和不确定之中，不知道如何向孩子解释。但是他依然站出来，给予了一个连自己都不甚理解的安慰。影片里，他仿佛是用尽了全身的力气，在镜头面前藏起不安，录了几句鼓励的话，一说完就露出了“刚才那样真的可以吗？”的神色。我在他身上发现，一个人不需要成为一个完人才能给予别人支持，爱和支持不需要百分之一百的自信和笃定也能有它们的力量。
要说不足的话，影片试图对Fred的人生空缺进行填补，仿佛是为了塑造一个更完美的形象。这些填补我不知道是否有必要。但是如果未来再碰到不确定的时刻，我愿意再把这部片拿出来看一看。它像柔软巨大的枕头一样，像对待孩子一样对待我，唤醒我孩子时的思维方式。然后，或许，这个孩子能解决大人解决不了的问题。